Saturday, April 04, 2009

OLLIE, YOU’RE BUMMING ME OUT.

TBF and I went split squad on the Red Sox games - him Friday, me today. I had mixed feelings about yet more preseason baseball (especially in inclement weather - as I said to TBF Friday afternoon, “Stay dry, have fun at the meaningless exhibition game at which I hope none of my players get hurt, because I would have to go hunt down Bud Selig and have words.”)  and would have been fine sitting things out had I not gotten an invitation to attend with Metschick and Melissa and Clare.

I had two motivations: one, photograph the Red Sox, and two, see what it was going to be like to watch a game at our new digs. I also wanted to check up on what progress had been made.

I need to redact a previous statement: the outfield walls are most certainly black. “None, none more black” black. Not blue. Not any shade of blue. Also black is the astroturf that is around the ginormous mutant new Home Run Apple, which was up when we walked in around 11. Clearly it interfered with the batter’s eye. As you probably know by now, the retired numbers are up, the out of town scoreboard is in proper working order, and pitch count and pitch speed are displayed in multiple locations. Still no sign of the championship banners, the trophies, or any other sign of Mets history inside the actual ballpark (although some more photo banners appeared along the left field wall outside). I am giving them until Opening Day before I start bitching louder on this account.

At 11:30 in the morning, I am chowing down on a Shack Burger, while waiting for Sara from Scoreboard Gourmet and Cyn from Toeing the Rubber.  Wanda had Box Frites, her brother had Blue Smoke, and I planned on some crab fries (which were not available and are no longer on the menu and if there will be no crab fries I will cry). Sara, who attended the Citi Field food preview day,  urged me to try the shrimp and corn chowder over at Catch of the Day, stating unequivocally that it was the best thing at the ballpark. (I followed her advice and I have to say that I was underwhelmed.) There are also tables out in what I am going to refer to from now on as “the food court”.

Our seats for today’s matchup were located in 329 on the Excelsior Level.  This felt more like home (where ‘home’ in this equation is the mezzanine at Shea) and we were even on the third base side, although further over than I was at Shea. From this position, I could not see the out of town scoreboard and I could not see plays in left field. Were I paying $70 for this seat during a regular season game, I would be irked. My dugout view was also similar, but the players are further back in the dugout, since the dugout itself is longer and wider, and I know with certainty I will not see anyone from Section 514.

It is tough to get used to where to look: where is pitch count? Where is pitch speed? What is that cable running through my view? What are the between-inning amusements? Are we not going to have a K count? Who the hell is Arpielle and why is their horrible cluttered ad flanking our main scoreboard? It made me long for Azek Trim Boards. TBF told me that he found sitting at the game Friday night to be overwhelming, that it was difficult for him to keep score (and he already does his own pitch count). On the way to the ballpark, I was grumbling because it was early and I was tired and I had been here twice already, did I really need a third time before Opening Day? The answer to that is yes, but even then it’s still not a real test because this was still not a game that anyone honestly cared about watching. I am curious, for example, about what the pedestrian traffic pattern will be along the outfield - right now everything slows to a halt as you cross the fan bridge and I wonder will it always be like that by its nature, or is it just because everyone is still getting used to the place? Time will tell.

And now, we get to the game. In case you were thinking that I wasn’t going to talk about the game, unfortunately, I have come to the point in this where I have no choice.

Oliver. Ollie, Ollie, Ollie.

As TBF and I sent to each other at about the same moment, OH MY GOD, OLIVER, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?  Today was a classic example of Oliver’s biggest problem, which is that he gets too emotional when he gets into a tight spot and can’t pull himself out of his own hole. That’s the thing with Ollie. I understand that you want to leave him in there, let him get through it, but he doesn’t. It just gets worse and worse and worse. I believe we were looking at 36 pitches before Jerry brought out the cane - IN THE FIRST INNING!

OLIVER! SCOTT BORAS IS WATCHING THIS!
OLIVER! WE PAID IN ADVANCE, BUDDY!
OLLIE! YOU’RE BUMMING ME OUT!

No, friends, that was not a random heckler, that was me.

TBF had reported 30% Red Sox fans on Friday night, and that number was slightly up today. It’s easy to spot them, though, when someone on their team HITS A GRAND SLAM IN THE FIRST INNING. No matter how polite you’d like to be as a fan of the visiting team, there’s no way you’re not going to stand, cheer and high-five when that happens.

Of interest to me during this nightmare of an inning was watching Reyes walk over to try to calm Oliver down - not Delgado, who is the usual suspect. You could have sent Dr. Phil out there today to talk to Oliver, clearly nothing was going to help.

That 6-0 lead in a game that didn’t count didn’t do much to help our general demeanor. I’m not sure if my stomach started to hurt because of the chowder or because of the game. I mean, you can blame a lot of things on the new stadium and the wind. You can forgive Beltran miscalculating a carom or Castillo misjudging a distance (okay, so you can’t forgive Castillo - TBF reported it took all of three minutes for him to get booed Friday night, and I’m sure the only reason he didn’t get booed on Saturday was because everyone had already used up their booing quotient on Oliver Perez). But it wasn’t the cold or the wind or the new stadium. This is Oliver Perez. This is what he does.

You know, I sat, I watched, I cheered - HEY! MEN ON BASE!! and at one point, even, with runners on first and second I thought Daniel Murphy could show us the apple (that thing is entirely too large for its own good), or maybe get a RBI, or, hell, GET ON BASE, OH MY GOD, I’LL TAKE ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, including Luis Castillo crossing home plate. I love watching John Maine pitch - I was even wearing #33 today - but what was the poor guy supposed to do? You know that face he makes when he gets into trouble? I swear to god he walked out of the bullpen wearing it. Can you blame him?

It wasn’t until that Kevin Youkilis three-run homer bringing the score to 9-1 that I gave up in earnest. It was windy, I was tired, and TBF was picking me up out on Roosevelt Avenue and we were heading straight out onto the road from Cincinnati, where I am finishing this up now. I had hoped to upload this earlier at a truck stop but found the wireless situation challenging. Tomorrow it is supposed to be 60 degrees, and we visit the Reds Hall of Fame. Full report to come.

[Because of the late hour, the photos are on Flickr, and not artistically arranged within the article. My apologies. I will deal with that later today.]

How were these games for you?